


Stupid Pills

by Coldwin, Knave_Iespyk



Category: Thundercats
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-30
Updated: 2010-08-30
Packaged: 2017-10-11 08:48:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/110574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coldwin/pseuds/Coldwin, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Knave_Iespyk/pseuds/Knave_Iespyk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when the Lunataks discover a means of rendering the Thundercats as stupid as rocks?  Intended mostly as a humour piece.  No actual plot was harmed in the making of this fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stupid Pills

THE STUPID PILLS

Alluro's lab was cluttered. Tug Mug had gotten into the liquor cabinet (again) and had torn the place apart. Thus, the hypnotist extrordinaire was working in the kitchen. "I wish that stupid moron would keep out of my stuff!" Alluro grumbled, wiping Tug Mug drool off his psyche club. "You know. You really shouldn't say his name. It's like ants at a picnic. They only come when you mention them," Psychro replied.  
"You're being weird again," Alluro mumbled. It was an odd assortment of characters at Skytomb. For no apparent reason Mystan's Lunataks and Luna's Lunataks had decided to patch their differences. In addition, some strange new Lunataks had arrived: Boron Stormhammer, Darius St. Clair, and Cameo Mymekon.  
"No really. See?" Psychro said, pointing to the doorway where a drunken Tug Mug stood.  
"Deed someone call mee?" Tug Mug asked, stumbling into the room.  
"That better not be my molecular pattern adjusting death ray of doom stuck to your chin," Alluro said, walking over to the Lunatak. Slowly he pulled it away from the pizza stained face. The hypnotist then tossed the ray gun onto the table, causing it to shoot through Tug Mug drool and pizza at a bottle of nearby pills.  
"Psikaris isn't going to be happy to hear you've blasted her birth control pills," Psychro remarked, hopping down from the counter and grabbing them. "Maybe they'll work anyway," Psychro frowned. "You better test those, Alluro," He said warningly, "I won't have you hurting her, again."

Alluro blanched slightly, between Psychro and the new Lunatak Cameo he was on thin ice, which reminded him of Knave. "Of course," he said, his voice one of mock kindness. Grabbing the bottle, he advanced on Tug Mug. "Come here!"  
"Ooh, what ees eet?" Tug Mug asked.  
"Candy, really?" Alluro said, then picking up his slime-covered club, "you will take one of these pills and eat it. Then you will tell me how you feel."  
"I weell take one of your peells and eeat eet. Then I weell tell you how I feeel," Tug Mug repeated. He took one in his hand and swallowed. "Mmm. I feel great. I theenk I'll go eat some liquor," he said, and then bounded off to find Alluro's private stash.  
"I'd better go stop him," Alluro said, tossing the pills back to Psychro.  
Psychro snorted and tossed the pill bottle in the garbage. "With Alluro its better safe than sorry," He thought reasonably.

* * *

Alluro running after Tug Mug found him drinking Red Eye's soup. "Something's not right here," he murmured, "even Tug Mug wont eat that slop."  
"Eet needs a leettle more skunk," Tug Mug said.  
"Tug Mug. I want you out of my room," Alluro said.  
"Sorry Allooro. I shouldn't have eaten your deenner," Tug Mug said. Then he pointed his gravity carbine at himself and fired. "Whee. Thees ees fun. You want to try?" he asked as he drifted to the ceiling . . .   
Alluro shook his head. "I have to get my hands on those pills. I've got a hunch I want to test out," he mumbled, dashing from the room.

* * *

Tug Mug however was happily floating around Skytomb. "Hey Loona," he called as he floated by. Amok was too shocked to move as Tug Mug floated by, scooped up Luna, and drifted out of the room. Amok eventually realized that his source of candy was leaving and began to give chase.

* * *

"So anyway, three Lunataks walk into a bar. Ouch, ouch, ouch," Boron chuckled as he leaned in the hall talking to Tycho.  
"That's great, but did you hear about the English teacher with the inflated ego?" Tycho asked.  
"Nope," Boron said.  
"Okay, so there's this English teacher at a high school named John Bor . . . " began Tycho, as first Tug Mug, then Amok bounded by.  
"Hey! Watch it!" Tycho shouted.  
"Luna. Must save Luna!" Amok growled.  
"My queen's in trouble. Come on!" Boron shouted, sprinting down the hall after Tug Mug. Tycho shrugged and followed suit.

It didn't take long to catch them, Tug Mug at floating speed was slow, only his head start had let him escape Amok. "Tug Mug, you bird brain, put me down!" Luna snapped.  
"Birds?" Tug Mug asked looking around.  
"Tug Mug can fly?" Tycho asked.  
"He's stolen the queen!" Boron yelled.  
"Luna! Amok want candy!" Amok shouted at the floating couple.  
Tycho sighed and grabbed a nearby cable. "I'll toss this up at them, use your power to make it catch Tug Mug's wheel," he said.  
"Sire." Boron acknowledged as Tyro tossed. Guided telepathically, the cable snared them easily, and with help from Amok they were quickly lowered.  
"Candy!" Amok bellowed.  
"Um yea," Tycho agreed. "Boron you take Luna and Amok inside," he picked up the cable attached to the still floating Tug Mug. "I'm gonna go fly a kite."

* * *

Alluro was bent over a lab rat. His pride and joy. It could run a small maze in under a minute. "Thing's smarter than Knave," Alluro muttered. He eased one of the birth control pills into the rat's food dish and watched it devour the pill quickly. "Now, to see if I'm right," he said, picking up the rodent. He dropped it into the maze and watched. It was with a mixture of pride and disappointment that he watched the rat run into walls and take wrong turns, even though it had navigated the maze hundreds of times. Pride because he was right. Disappointment because he'd lost his smart rat.

* * *

Cautiously Alluro slipped into Knave's bedroom. The hybrid was asleep, curled up with Shade draped on top of him. Alluro paused, took a picture, and then continued over to the large bottle of Pepsi they kept in their mini fridge. "I bet I can capture more pictures for Cheezey once I give them these strange pills," he thought, dropping two pills into the bottle. No sooner had he reached for the door, though, than Shade woke up. "Go to sleep," he said hypnotically before she was truly awake, knocking her back out.

* * *

The sun was beginning to rise. Red Eye and Cameo sat in Skytomb's control room, surveying the land. "Still nothing to report," Cameo said.  
"It's going to be a long day. Nothing ever happens out here. Nothing to do but kick back and read some books," Red Eye replied, tossing Cameo a copy of 'Rage of Innocents' while taking a copy of 'Nightcloak' for himself.  
At this point Shade, or more accurately Nightshade, walked in. "I've got a small problem." She announced to Red Eye.  
"Nightshade," Red Eye said pleasantly. While he didn't particularly care for the wraith, Nightshade was his daughter . . . to a degree.  
"Something's wrong with . . . " she began, her eye suddenly twitched. "Buttons!" Shade exclaimed happily, before pressing them randomly.  
"The hell?" Cameo yelled.  
Nightshade stopped pushing buttons. "That's what I wanna know!" She growled.

* * *

"Hey Luna!" Knave shouted from the balcony overlooking where the brute men were working.  
"What is it Knave?" she asked angrily, still somewhat annoyed over the Tug Mug incident.  
"Don't you wish you could see the moon again?" Knave asked dreamily.  
"Yes, your point?" Luna asked.  
"You really want to see the moon?" Knave asked.  
"Yes, dammit, I do. Get to the point!" Luna snapped. Even as she spoke Knave turned and dropped his pants. "Get him Amok!"  
Even on stupid pills Knave knew this was bad. "Oh shit!" He cried, running down the hallway with Amok close behind. Seeing Boron standing nearby he had an idea only a moron could have. "Hey Amok!" He called. "Boron's a candy ass!"  
"Candy?" Amok asked and tackled Boron.  
"No, Amok! Don't!" Luna cried. "There's plenty of candy for you if you catch Knave!"

* * *

Psikaris paced angrily back and forth across her bedroom. Not that she was planning on doing anything but with Cameo around anything was possible, her birth control pills were missing and one never knew when one would need them. "Would you calm down?" a second Psikaris, actually Darius in disguise, asked.  
"I can't. Who would steal my pills? If it was someone hoping to knock me up, it isn't happening!" Psikaris fumed, slamming her fist against the nearby wall.  
At this point Tug Mug once more in Sky Tomb, but still floating . . . came by. "Tasted good," he called in greeting and wafted off.  
"What?" Darius asked, changing into a massive hulking brute and grabbing the rotund Lunatak.  
"Those yummy peells that Allooro gave me," Tug Mug said.  
"Alluro!" Psikaris hissed.  
"Let's find him!" Darius agreed, dragging Tug Mug along behind him.

* * *

All the Lunataks, save for Psychro who was on watch duty, were gathered in the meeting room. Tug Mug, Knave and Shade were locked in a cage, so they wouldn't hurt themselves, and Alluro was being held by Amok. "You've got some explaining to do Alluro," Luna said.  
"Well. It all started with Tug Mug drooling on one of my weapons. The weapon fired and hit Psikaris' pills. Tug Mug ate one and then I *ahem* slipped one into Knave and Shade's drinks," Alluro said.  
Chilla was about to say something to the hypnotist when suddenly the three stupid people ran to the window. "Butterfly!" Knave shouted.  
"Such a preetee theeng," Tug Mug added.  
Nightshade snarled in disgust. "Someone do som . . . " Then Shade was in control again, "pretty!"  
Tug Mug began bouncing up and down. "Fly! Fly!"  
Knave lost interest in the butterfly and stared at Chilla. "Blue," he announced at last and assumed a smug look. "Definitely blue."  
"Someone get those morons out of here!" Tycho snapped. Red Eye and Cameo rushed to obey.  
"Now then. It seems that there are two things that are obvious. Number one. We must cure our allies. Number two. We should use these pills against the Thundercats," Luna mused.  
"Brilliant suggestion Queen Luna," Boron said.  
"I'll get right on it," Psikaris said, snatching up the pills.  
"Take Alluro with you. When Cameo returns he will chaperone," Luna said.  
"As you wish," Psikaris growled. She grabbed Alluro by the wrist and forcibly moved him down the hall.

* * *

Cameo found them in Alluro's lab, not having Psikaris' powers at the moment, he couldn't follow their conversation. Laying his hand casually on the distracted hypnotist' shoulder, he copied his powers and grabbed the Psyche club. "You cannot resist me, Alluro," he said, in the same tones Alluro used, "you will stand up and run into the wall. You will continue running into the wall until Karis tells you to stop."  
Alluro stood and turned. He crouched low and sprinted into the wall. Psikaris, sitting on a stool looking at Alluro's prized rat, raised her eyebrow. "Pull up a chair. Alluro won't be needing it for a little while," she said. Cameo smiled and plunked himself down in it.  
"I thought you'd never ask," he said.

* * *

Tycho and Boron led the first patrol into what they were calling "Light Side" home of the good creatures of Third Earth. In the distance they could see Aker and Bengali examining a tree.

"Hmm. You'll notice here that the bark is flecked with purple spots. That makes it a Dafmid tree. The leaves of this tree cures the Waapahegin Fever," Bengali said.  
"That's good. The Warrior Maidens have been saying that there's a lot of that going around," Aker replied.  
"The problem is that there are only ten of these trees in existence, all growing here," Bengali said.  
"Aw, that's too bad. I guess we'll just have to chop them all down," Tycho sneered, stepping forward.  
"No. We came for one job only. Damaging these trees could put us at risk if we ever get that fever," Boron said, stepping out beside Tycho.  
"But we can still beat these Cats," the fledgling prince said.

Tycho and Boron paired off with Bengali and Aker respectively. "Surrender now Cat! You are no match for me," Boron said, levelling his sword at Aker's chest.  
"You really expect me to do that?" Aker asked.  
"No, but it is only right to give one's opponent fair warning that he is about to lose," Boron replied.  
"We'll see about that," Aker spat. He fired the Dagger of Omens, bouncing his energy blast against the Lunar Blade. Boron narrowed his eyes and pointed at Aker. The Lion was propelled off his feet and into a rock pile. Aker struggled to his feet but found Boron's telekinetic hand clenched around his throat, forcing him to black out.  
"Boron, take Bengali," Tycho ordered seeing Aker down.  
"Yes my prince," Boron replied.  
"Here Thundercat, a pill to cure the headache your gonna have." So saying Tycho popped one of the pills into Aker's mouth.

Boron finished Bengali in equally quick fashion and allowed Tycho to give him a pill too. "Come then. Our work here is done. I wonder how Chilla and Red Eye are doing around Cat's Lair," Tycho said.

* * *

Bengali rubbed his head. "What happened?" he asked, standing and cracking his head against a tree branch above him. There was a fit of laughter nearby. Bengali looked and saw Aker cackling. Whatever was affecting Aker wasn't good, Bengali knew that. He flipped on his communicator. "Cat's lair com . . . " He stopped noticing the Thundercat insignia. "Here kitty, kitty." He called to it, the small read light transmitting his call to cat's lair and a very insulted Wily Kit.  
"I'm not a kid," Wily Kit said, indignant. Bengali was about to answer her but saw a squirrel walk by.  
"Oh my. But you are a beautiful creature. I want to run my hands down that little back of yours," Bengali said.

* * *

In the Lair Wily Kit was suddenly grateful they'd adopted headsets. Even so, her face turned bright red. I mean. Sure she found him attractive but . . . "Uh, Wily Kat. Could you take over? I'll be back soon," she said, disconnecting the signal.  
"Sure thing Kit. Where you headed?" Kat asked.  
"Bengali asked me to go give him something. I'll be back. Don't worry," Wily Kit said, hopping on her space board.

* * *

Aker having heard Bengali and then seen the squirrel frowned. "That's not a cat." He protested. "It's a dog."  
"Nope it's a cat."  
"Dog."  
"Cat."  
"Dog."  
"Wily Kat."  
The two resumed laughing and rolling across the ground, laughing. The squirrel took off. "Don't worry I'll bring it to you!" Aker chuckled, off in hot pursuit. Bengali stretched and sat leaning against a tree. There was a whirr of noise as Wily Kit entered the small clearing. "Hi Bengali," she said, running her hand through her hair.  
"Hey there Wily Kit. You wanna play with my little hammer?" he asked.  
"Oh, is that what you call it? Uh sure," Wily Kit said, moving to kneel between Bengali's knees.  
"My, Kit. Anyone ever tell you that you've got neat lips?" he asked, as the kitten used the aforementioned lips on his 'hammer'. Bengali's eyes widened. "This is unexpected," he said.

* * *

Chilla and Red Eye looked at the Lair. "Ha, ha, ha. There's Lion-O. Walking toward the woods alone. He would be most interesting to get 'stupid' don't you think?" Red Eye asked.  
"Icing him will be a piece of cake," Chilla hissed.

The two Lunataks moved swiftly through the woods. They caught Lion-O completely unaware. Covering him in ice even as the Sword of Omens warned him of danger. Chilla quickly popped a pill in Lion-O's mouth and then freed him. Three laser blasts later they realized their mistake, the man could get no dumber, or so they thought.  
"That's it you funny clowns. If you don't start juggling, I'm going to wave around this sword thing until you're black and blue!" Lion-O shouted, the pills finally taking hold. Chilla and Red Eye shrugged. Why not. Chilla picked up some rocks and began juggling. Red Eye followed suit.  
"Much better. Now I gotta go teach the Thundertank how to roll over and play dead," Lion-O said, running.

* * *

"Alluro. You can stop that now. You're getting blood all over the carpet," Psikaris said, "and you're giving me one heck of a headache." Alluro obeyed, as per Cameo's suggestion, and collapsed on the floor. "Much better. Now, what if we gave it this special compound of candy fruit and mercury?" Psikaris mused.  
"It worked for the Thundercats at one point," Cameo remarked, remembering the last time Jon and Kith got together for a joint fic.  
"Anything's worth a shot," Psikaris said.

* * *

Alluro glared at the pair, more accurately at Cameo. "Someday he'll not be paying attention to me, and just as soon as Cameo's guard is down I'll bash him with the psyche club," he thought. Uneasily he got to his feet and tiptoed quietly to a spot just behind the Lunatak. "Squeak!" the little rat said, overjoyed to see its master. Alluro quickly lowered the club as Cameo wheeled around. "What do you think you're doing here?" he demanded.  
"I merely came over to help. Might I suggest we get our hands on some fertility drugs?" Alluro suggested.  
"Not a bad idea. I'll go rifle through Psychro's stuff. I think he has some," Psikaris said, leaving the two men alone in the room.

* * *

"Lion-O! What do you think you're doing with that flower pot and the Thundertank?" Panthro bellowed.  
The Lion shrugged. "The flower said it was too cramped so I'm replanting it," so saying he pushed the plant, dirt and all into the gas tank. "All done." Panthro pushed Lion-O back.  
"What in blazes do you think you're doing?" Panthro asked.  
"Sorry Panthro. I've explained once, I don't have time to explain again. Gotta go put whoopee cushions on all the chairs. It'll be a blast!"

* * *

Cheetara, out for a jog was ambushed by Cheetalia. "Catch me if you can!" She called zooming by. One thing a Cheetah could never resist was a Cheetah race. As they zoomed down the path Cheetalia tossed one of the little pills into the panting Cheetara's mouth.  
"What was that?" she demanded.  
"Absolutely nothing," Cheetalia said. "Just trying to even us up."  
"Hey. You want to even things up. How about a game of hopscotch," Cheetara said.  
"Uh, sure," Cheetalia said.  
"Hmph. I don't have any scotch. Oh well, I'll just run back to the Lair and get some," Cheetara said.

* * *

Psychro walked slowly toward the Tower of Omens. Luna had ordered him to get another cat "stupid" so here he was. He heard a noise. He was an expert in the art of love making, and knew at once what it was. He crept closer and pushed aside the bushes. All he could see was a blissful expression on Bengali's face and an equally enthusiastic look on Wily Kit's.  
He blinked a few times than shrugged. A few minutes later the two Thundercats called a short break. "Hey you, come here," He called to Bengali.  
"Hey one of those purple people," Bengali smiled happily and walked over.  
"Um yea, look I saw you having fun and thought I'd give you this." He pressed it into the stupid tiger's hand. "Give this to her and she'll love you for it."  
"Sure thing," Bengali said, merrily skipping back to feed his love slave a stupid pill.

Wily Kit looked up at Bengali. She had dozed after the experience of a lifetime and found Bengali offering her something to eat. It looked suspiciously like a birth control pill. At least he was being careful. "Does that mean there will be a next time?" she asked, scratching behind his ear.  
"Uh, sure. Why not?" Bengali shrugged.

* * *

Back in Skytomb Psikaris and Cameo whooped for joy. "We've done it. I can't believe how simple it was," Psikaris said.  
"Done what?" Alluro asked.  
"Oh, I wouldn't expect you to understand," Cameo snickered.  
"No, really what have you done?" Alluro asked.  
"Cured the stupid pills, of course," Psikaris said.  
"With what?" Alluro asked, coming closer.  
"It was so simple. I can't believe we didn't think of it. I'm sure you'll figure it out for yourself . . . " Psikaris smirked.  
Suddenly Tug Mug's voice cried out. "Ah I have no feet!"  
Alluro grimaced. "Just tell me. Between the three idiots, Nightshade's ranting and Luna's screams, I have a headache."  
Psikaris smiled. "Us too, that's how we found the cure. They'd given us a headache so we came here, Cameo dropped his aspirin and your rat ate it." She stepped aside to show the rat running the maze easily.  
"Amazing. Now we can cure these morons and have done with it," Alluro said, taking a bottle of Aspirin.  
"Shouldn't we tell him what the rat did before it became normal?" Psikaris asked.  
"Nope. I'm sure his brilliant mind's already deduced that," Cameo snickered.

Alluro stepped closer to the three trapped stupid people. "Who wants a nice happy pill?" Alluro asked. Instantly three hands went up, shoving the other's hands away.  
"All right then. Knave first, just in case there are adverse effects," Alluro said, slipping a pill into Knave's mouth.

Knave felt rage. Pure, utter, rage. Uncontrollable rage. He lashed out at Alluro and caught him by the throat. "I should kill you!" he roared. Then he became meek. "I'm sorry Alluro, please don't hurt me," and finally became normal. Alluro turned and saw that Cameo and Psikaris were hiding behind a bookshelf.  
"Come on then. Give Shade her pill," Cameo said, not getting out.  
"Why me?" Alluro asked.  
"Because you're so good at it," Psikaris replied. Alluro shot the pair a scathing glance.  
"Fine. Open wide Shade," Alluro said, gulping.

Shade's eyes narrowed to slits and her arm extended, firing a black net at Alluro. With her other hand she yanked him so that he collided with the cage. Then she took his head in her hands and stroked his hair. "Alluro. I can't believe I hurt you. It goes against everything I believe in," she said softly. Then her body twitched and she shoved him away.

"I'll get you two," he snarled, looking back at them, Shade had dissolved the netting.  
"Not till you fix Tug Mug " Psikaris said enjoying the show.  
This time he got smart. "Here Tug Mug, candy."  
"YAY!" Tug Mug squealed happily catching the tiny pill and swallowing it.

Tug Mug looked around for something or someone to whack and saw his two fellow captives. His gauntleted hand shot out and smashed Knave's face, shattering the nose. Then he turned to Shade and gave her a passionate kiss to make up for hitting her soon-to-be husband. He then pulled away, totally cured but now facing two angry teammates. A few seconds later he was trussed up in a black net and covered in ice.  
"Open the door Alluro." Knave said, his broken nose making his voice garbled. "We're gonna go play with Tug Mug,"  
"After I find some mouth wash," was Shades comment.  
"Of course," Alluro said, opening the door carefully. After the happy couple and captive were gone, he turned for Cameo and Psikaris, to find them missing.

* * *

Luna had decided that she wanted to drug some Thundercats herself, so she guided Amok through the Forest of Mists where she knew that Ghost and Lynx-O were working on new fog lamps. Boron and Tycho had naturally insisted on coming along.

"So, the way I see it all we have to do is increase the intensity of the bulb. That should show us a bit more," Ghost said.  
"Well, I may not 'see' but I believe you may be correct, heh, heh, heh," Lynx-O said.  
"That's it! No more sight puns!" Luna cried, Amok plowing forward.  
"Oh no Ghost, look out!" Lynx-O shouted. He rolled to the side, only to find Boron in his way. His jaw dropped, stunned, at the Lunatak's sudden appearance. Boron took this chance to shove a pill down his throat.  
Ghost looked on, intangible, the Lunataks couldn't find her. "I'll go get Lion-O," she called to Lynx-O, she hated leaving him but she couldn't beat three Lunataks, four if Luna counted.  
"That's okay. I'll just play Blind Man's Bluff with my new friends. Now, who wants to go first?" Lynx-O asked.

* * *

Lion-O snuck up slowly behind Snarf and yanked his tail. "Gotcha!" he snickered. Cheetara sped into the room. "Lion-O! Love what you've done to your hair," she said, pulling out a razor. "But let's change your old style!"  
Lion-O, however, had other plans and pulled out a marker left over from when he was drawing. "Connect the spots!"  
"Lion-O! Cheetara! What do you think you're doing?" Tygra demanded, running over from his post at the comm system.  
"I'm gonna cut Lion-O's hair," Cheetara said innocently.  
Lion-O glared. "Not till I connect your spots."  
"Try it," Cheetara said dangerously.  
"Ok," with that he stepped forward.  
"Gotta catch me first!" Cheetara taunted, running out the door. Lion-O followed just as Ghost entered.

"Snarf, snarf, what's gotten into those two?" Snarf whined.  
"I don't know, but we've got problems. Lynx-O and I were just attacked by Lunataks. I got away, Lynx-O? I don't know," Ghost said.  
"He's probably in Skytomb by now. Let's gather the Thundercats and meet at the Tower of Omens," Tygra suggested.  
"Only one problem with that. Lion-O's still got the Sword of Omens, which we'd need to summon the Thundercats," Ghost said.  
"Leave that problem to me, snarf, snarf. If old Snarf can't convince him to use it, no one can," Snarf said, scurrying off in the direction Lion-O and Cheetara went.  
Ghost collapsed in a chair. "Lynx-O captured. Bengali and Kit missing. Cheetara and Lion-O doing who knows what, and Snarf to the rescue," she sighed. "We're screwed."

* * *

"Lion-O! Wait for me!" Snarf called, running down the hall. He nearly tripped over them. They were juggling Panthro's screwdrivers.  
"Oh hi Snarf," Lion-O smiled and dropped his screw drivers. "Gotcha!" He exclaimed, picking up Snarf. "Hey wait a sec you don't have spots." Then he saw Cheetara. "Oh yeah that's you." He dropped Snarf and they were off again.

* * *

"I didn't get it," Snarf said dejectedly. Ghost shot Tygra a look that said "I told you so."  
"Where's Lion-O!" Panthro demanded, running in. "He painted the Tank Pink with a magic marker!"  
Tygra just pointed down the hall.  
"Thanks," Panthro said before running after Lion-O a few seconds later they heard him trip on a screwdriver.

* * *

Wily Kat and Black Claw had been sent to find some of the missing in action Thundercats, but they could not be prepared for their attackers. Mystan Benekasbeel and Cheetalia appeared before them. "I'll take the old man. You take the boy," Mystan said, directing a telekinetic blast at the ground beneath Black Claw's feet. The Tiger leapt off the dirt and dove at Mystan.  
"Too predictable, cat," Mystan sneered, bringing his hands together. A pair of trees slammed together, pinning him. He popped the pill into the tiger's mouth, who then began to make illusions of pink bunnies.

Wily Kat never had a chance. Cheetalia used her supper speed to get behind him, stomped on his toe then shove the pill in his screaming mouth.

Mystan pulled out a small score card. "That's Wily Kat and Black Claw, who's left?"  
"At the Tower of Omens there's: Snarfer and Pumyra. At Cat's Lair there's: Snarf, Tygra, and Panthro," Cheetalia replied.  
"Five, and two are Snarfs. Not bad. I say we just make an all out attack, but that's Luna's call," Mystan shrugged.  
"Let's get back to Skytomb," Cheetalia said.

* * *

"Well, Luna. That's my suggestion," Mystan said, when all the Lunataks were gathered together.  
"It could work, you know," Darius added.  
"Hmm. So we attack the Tower of Omens and then take Cat's Lair," Luna mused.  
"Precisely. It could work," Mystan said.  
"I'd still like all the cats to be 'stupid' but most of them are ours. Let's do it!" Luna shouted.

* * *

Wily Kit and Bengali were relaxing by looking at clouds. "That one looks like a chicken." Wily Kit said pointing.  
"Yea it does," Bengali agreed. "Hey look that one looks like Skytomb."  
"That is Skytomb." Wily Kit announced.  
"Hmm you're right." A few seconds later both were in a cell. "No more clouds." Bengali said in a matter of fact manner, before pulling out a harmonica.

* * *

Pumyra and Snarfer were singing a duet of "Hot Rocket Baby" when Lynx-O came stumbling in. "We have too many stairs. There are precisely five hundred and fifty-one. We should get rid of one and make it a nice round number," he said.  
"Is Lynx-O going senile, snarfer, snarfer?" the little cat asked.  
"Snarfer. It's not polite too . . . " Pumyra began, stopping as she saw Aker walking to the Tower on his hands. "What's Aker up to? Ugh! And what does he have in his mouth?" Pumyra.  
"Oh dear. That does look like fun. I think I'll try that too," Lynx-O said, as he tried to stand on his hands. The other two Thundercats were too busy looking at Lynx-O to notice what he saw, and too shocked to realize he could see. "Aker phone home!" He exclaimed pointing, then falling over.  
"What?" Pumyra asked looking out the window in time to see Luna leading Aker inside Sky Tomb.  
"Come on! We have to go rescue them!" Pumyra shouted, tripping over Lynx-O on the way.  
"I don't think that'll be necessary, my pretty," Darius said levelling his laser rifle at the prone Thundercat.

Snarfer looked around, trying to find some way of helping his friends, but realized that Knave and Cheetalia had slipped through the window. "Knave to Luna. We've bagged three more cats," the hybrid said.

With Darius still holding his rifle at Pumyra's head, Cheetalia walked over and shoved a pill down her gullet. She then did the same to Snarfer, though she despised touching the creature. The three new prisoners were marched down to the prisons.  
"Now! Onto Cat's Lair!" Luna shrieked.

* * *

On the way the Lunataks picked up Lion-O and Cheetara, actually as they landed and prepared to capture them, Cheetara ran in to get away from Lion-O who ran in right behind her. The Lunataks just shrugged and put them in the same cage. They laughed for twenty minutes as Lion-O used a pink marker to connect Cheetara's spots.

* * *

Black Claw glanced up and saw Psikaris and Cameo approaching. Wily Kat was sprawled on the ground playing with the pink bunnies. Black Claw was still pinned between the trees. "Hey look! She's got a vest! Can I try it on?" Wily Kat asked Psikaris.  
"Tell you what. If you go into Skytomb's prison, I'll give you all the vests you want," she replied.  
"Oh goody," Wily Kat cheered, running for Skytomb.

Cameo looked at the two trees and sighed, he had Psikaris's powers but not quite as strong. "I'm gonna have a headache," he muttered and pulled the two trees apart with his mind. "Ok follow the kitten so you don't get lost."  
"Ok."  
"Cameo to Luna. Two more captured."

* * *

Panthro didn't like it. There were no reports from anyone. Tygra was up in the control room, Snarf in the kitchen and he himself was in the garage, tinkering with the Thundertank. "Attention Panthro! Skytomb's on it's way!" Tygra shouted over the intercom.  
"They probably have the others. Let's get ready for a fight!" Panthro replied, hopping into the Tank along with Snarf.

* * *

Inside Skytomb, Lion-O was on the bridge. "Ok, I say what's on this paper and I get a candy bar right?" Lion-O asked Luna.  
"That's it, just read the card."  
"Ok," Lion-O smiled and read the card over the PA system. "This is Lion-O. Hi mom!"  
Luna snapped off the PA "No adlibbing!"  
"Oh fine, but I'd better get my candy." He turned on the PA again.  
"This is Lion-O, oh wait, I said that. Panthro drop your weapons and give up or Amok will squish my head. Ok bye."

* * *

"We have to do it, Panthro. We can't let the Lunataks hurt Lion-O!" Snarf whined.  
"I know Snarf. All right then. Let's go," Panthro sighed, climbing out of the Thundertank. The two were met by Chilla and Shade, who fed them their stupid pills.

* * *

Once they were inside Skytomb Luna turned to all her troops. "All right then. There's one Thundercat left. I want every last one of you to go in there and take him out!" Luna barked. Just as the Lunatak's disembarked Lion-O accidentally depressed the button controlling the main cannon, Cat's Lair exploded in a giant flash.  
"Damn you Lion-O" Luna shrieked hitting him with her crop. "I wanted a tiger skin rug!"  
"No big deal, Luna. You still have Black Claw down in the dungeons," Alluro said.  
"Hmm. You may be right. Now that we have all the Thundercats. What should we do with them?" Luna mused.  
"Dinner," Knave snickered.  
"Wipe them out. Plain and simple," Psychro added.  
"But swiftly and painlessly of course. They may be our enemies but they deserve to die with dignity," Psikaris said, Boron nodding.  
Cameo cleared his throat. "Why don't we draw straws or something? We can go in order of longest straw to shortest to pic a Thundercat for a pet slave or whatever."  
"There is but one flaw to your plan," Psychro said. "There are sixteen of us and thirteen of them, fourteen if you count the various pieces of Tygra."  
"Then it's obvious. Three of us don't get pets. I'll volunteer. They're your enemies, not mine," Darius said.  
"Amok can share mine," Luna said, patting the beast on the head. "Any volunteers to miss a cat?" Luna looked around the room. But no one said a word. "Any nominations?" she asked, wickedly.  
"Knave," Alluro said.  
"Alluro," Knave quipped.  
"Alluro," Psikaris and Cameo added.  
"Tug Mug," Tycho said.  
"Alluro," Shade said.  
"Alluro," Chilla said.  
"Alluro," Cheetalia said.  
"Just to be different. Alluro," Psychro said.  
"Well then. It looks like Alluro wins," Luna said.

The Lunataks began the labourious process of drawing names, omitting Luna because she demanded on going first. "I get to have Pumyra. Having someone who can mend wounds could come in handy," Luna said. Pumyra wandered over to behind Luna.

The first name drawn was Psikaris. She calmly looked over the assembled Cats and finally said, "Panthro, for his mind of course."

Strangely, Cameo was drawn next. "Cheaters," muttered Tug Mug.  
Cameo smiled. "I'll take Cheetara." Before he could claim his prize, Psikaris stopped him.  
"Why?" She demanded.  
Cameo kissed her on the cheek and smiled. "You ever tried beating Knave to dinner?"  
She didn't look convinced but she let him claim the cheetah.

Boron drew and looked with disdain at the Thundercats. "I suppose that if I must pick someone, I will choose the one who has given my Queen the most trouble. Lion-O," he said, pointing with his Lunar Blade.

Knave was next and instantly snapped up Bengali. "I'm going to enjoy every minute of slavery you have under me, until one day I drop you in the pot," Knave snarled.

Psychro's name was selected next. "Hmm. All the good women have been taken, leaving me with Wily Kit and Ghost. I don't really want to have to wait for my prize to mature and grow in certain areas, so I'll take Ghost," he said.

Redeye was drawn next. "Lynx-O," he said shrugging.

Chilla surprised everyone with her choice. "Snarfer!" She hissed evilly.

Shade grinned, "I'll take Snarf then, they can spend their last moments together."

"It is only fitting that I take Aker," Tycho said.

"Black Claw," Mystan said with a helpless shrug.

"Wily Kit," Cheetalia said.

"I'm last! I guess Wilee Kat ees mine," grumbled Tug Mug.

"And so, we Lunataks shall remain the most powerful force in the universe!" Luna cried, "for if the mighty Thundercats have failed, who can stop us?"

THE END


End file.
